Much of what keeps intimacy comfortable through menopause as the sexual symptoms of what’s called genitourinary syndrome of menopause, or GSM, set in comes down to a few everyday habits. This is the part you can shape yourself.

Stay sexually active

It may sound counterintuitive when sex has become uncomfortable, but staying sexually active with a partner or through self-stimulation helps maintain blood flow, elasticity, and lubrication in the vaginal tissues. When discomfort leads to avoiding intimacy, symptoms can worsen, so gentle, comfortable activity is itself supportive.

Make comfort routine

A little preparation goes a long way. Keep a lubricant on hand for sex to reduce friction and discomfort, and use a vaginal moisturizer regularly a few times a week so the tissues are more comfortable to begin with. Many women use both.

Comfortable intimacy is something you can build toward gently, and at your own pace.

Go at your own pace

If sex has become painful due to tightness or narrowing, vaginal dilators let you progress slowly and comfortably at your own pace, easing both the physical tightness and the anxiety that can build around penetration. They’re often used alongside lubricants and moisturizers. (There’s more in our guide to sexual treatment options.)

Support the tissues day to day

The same habits that help the vaginal tissues help here too: avoiding irritants such as perfumed soaps and douching, and if you smoke quitting, since smoking lowers estrogen’s effect on the tissues and worsens dryness.

When everyday care isn’t enough

If pain during sex isn’t relieved by lubricants, or intimacy is being affected, talk to your provider local hormonal therapies are highly effective. Because these symptoms tend to worsen rather than resolve on their own, addressing them early helps.

This article is general information, not medical advice. Any decision about managing menopause symptoms should be made with your own healthcare provider.